Memories
by Hopeakaarme
Summary: AU. Going to Remus and Sirius's home, Harry's asked to look at their Pensieve. The memories there surprise and shock Harry, but not as much as his guardians' news. Implied MPREG and SLASH RLSB. Complete.
1. Welcome Home

Disclaimer: Mine? Don't make me laugh.

A/N: Yeah, this story is actually complete, just wait and see...

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Memories

Chapter 1

Welcome Home

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It was the beginning of summer holidays after Harry's fifth year. For the first time in his life, Harry was eager to leave Hogwarts.

He had a good reason for this. Peter Pettigrew had been caught during the Christmas break. Dumbledore had managed to make the Ministry have a proper trial. And, eventually, Sirius had been set free.

At first he had been more than a bit shocked when he had revealed the truth about Sirius and Lupin's relationship. The truth being that the two were married - had been for years, apparently. After a while he had begun to cope with it, and even homophobic Ron had at last came to terms with it - although not without a lot of whining. The Trio had also learned to call Lupin by his given name - something that had took long time especially from Hermione, who still felt a bit odd calling their former professor simply "Remus," not "professor Lupin."

So now Harry was returning to a real home for summer - Sirius and Remus's house. Sirius had sent the adoption papers to the Ministry at the same day he had been proved innocent, and around May, Harry Potter had finally become Harry Black. He had been given the choice between keeping his own name and changing it, and he had chosen the latter. Sirius was the nearest to a father he could remember having, after all, since he had no memories of his real parents. Therefore it was only logical that he'd take Sirius's name.

As the train arrived to the King's Cross, Harry felt odd. He wouldn't be returning to Dursley's. When they got out to the station, he immediately recognized Sirius's tall form in the crowd next to Mister and Mrs. Weasley's red hair. When they got nearer, he saw that they were talking with Hermione's parents, who looked quite cautious, but were still happily participating the conversation.

As he, Ron and Hermione reached the adults, Sirius immediately pulled him into a tight bear-hug. "Harry!" he exclaimed before the boy had even opportunity to open his mouth. "It's good to see you."

Harry stepped back a bit breathlessly before replying, "It's good to see you, too, Sirius. But where's Remus?"

"Yeah, where he is?" Ron asked. "I thought you'd both come to fetch Harry."

"He's already waiting at home," Sirius smiled. "He felt a little bit tired."

"Oh!" Hermione exclaimed. "Nothing serious, I hope?"

"No, no," Sirius laughed. "Remus is just fine, believe me. No reasons to be worried. As I said, he's just tired." Then he turned towards Harry again. "Shall we go then?"

Harry smiled and nodded. He felt weird as he followed his new adopted father out from the station. There was a new, black car waiting for them, and Sirius shoved Harry's trunk to the backseat.

"This is gorgeous!" Harry exclaimed. "How did you get this?"

"Well, my family was not one of the poorest," Sirius grinned as the settled down in the car. "And I got a huge compensation from Ministry for my years in Azkaban." His expression darkened for a while, but then he laughed again. "Remie's eyes nearly popped out when he saw this. He gave me at least half an hour of lecture how I shouldn't use money so carelessly, but for some reason he didn't say anything as I purchased the house we're living in."

Harry chuckled. Lecturing about Sirius's behaviour sounded just like Remus. Whenever he had the opportunity to see the two men openly together, Remus was always saying something about Sirius's actions. The black-haired man, however, never seemed to even notice those remarks, and Harry was quite sure that Remus said them more for custom than for being really distracted by his husband's behaviour.

It took quite some time to arrive to Sirius and Remus's apartment. It was a big house, more like a mansion, outside the town. Harry never ceased to wonder just how much money Sirius had.

"You can leave your trunk to the car," Sirius told him as he stopped the car. "The house-elves will get it inside."

Harry nodded, rising from the car. Still eyeing the house wonderingly, he started walking towards it beside Sirius. His godfather seemed to notice his amazement, but merely chuckled, not bothering commenting on it.

As they stepped inside, Sirius stopped for a moment. Then he turned towards Harry and said, "The kitchen is over there. Go ask the house-elves something to eat, you're surely hungry. Come to the living room then, there's something I'd like to show you."

Obedient as ever, Harry indeed went to the kitchen. A couple of over-enthusiastic house-elves prepared him a chicken sandwich, which he soon ate - Sirius had been right, he was indeed hungry. After finishing the sandwich, he asked the house-elves for some directions for the living room, then left the kitchen.

When Harry came to the living room, he, for his great surprise, found Sirius standing there with a wide stone bowl. There was some silvery glowing liquid whirling in the bowl.

"I'd like to show you some memories," Sirius said, with an unusually serious voice. "I'm sure you know what a Pensieve is. I found this one from the attic in the oldest of my houses."

Harry nodded, not sure what to say. "So they are your memories?" he asked after a while.

"I and Remus's, both of us," the other Gryffindor replied with a nod.

"If they're both of your memories, why Remus isn't here?" Harry asked suspiciously.

"Remus... didn't want to be here when you see these memories."

"Why so?" Harry asked, astonished. If it was Remus's memory as well as Sirius's, one would think he wanted to be present when it was showed to anyone, right?

"It's pretty painful, Harry. It is to both of us, but much more to him. You'll understand after you've seen this."

Harry nodded, feeling slightly nervous. If it was so painful, was it really necessary that he would see it?

Sirius nodded to him encouragingly. He took a deep breath, then bent forward. He pressed his face to the silver mist, thus entering the memories.

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Next Chapter: **The First Memory** (Yeah, I'm aware of how pathetic the name is)

Harry sees his first and only Christmas with his parents, and also finds out something surprising about Remus and Sirius.


	2. The First Memory

Disclaimer: No, they're still not mine.

A/N: Nothing to say, actually...

WARNING: Implied MPREG (RL/SB) in this chapter!

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Chapter 2

The First Memory

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It was nice and warm. There were candles everywhere, and the whole little house was decorated for Christmas. A large Christmas-tree was decorated as well, and the angel on the top was quietly singing.

There were four people sitting in the two sofas in front of the fireplace. They were cheerfully chatting about everything and anything, totally happy and carefree. There were torn wrappings of presents all around them, and a tawny cat was playing with one sheet of the papers.

"Look who's smiling to Mommy, who?" chirped a redheaded woman, holding a little, dark-haired baby on her arms. "Is it Mommy's big boy, is it? Oh yes, it's Harry! Oh, what a big boy he is!"

"Don't worry, she isn't dangerous," the man next to her said soothingly to their two guests. "At least not much, as long as you don't try to get Harry away from her."

"Shut up, James," said one of the men sitting on the sofa opposite to the tiny family. He had long, light brown hair, tied on a ponytail, and the fire was making his amber eyes shine. "You know you're just as bad yourself."

"As well as you are, Moony, my dear," the last person said, patting gently the light-haired man's shoulder. "And I'm guilty as well. Who could resist that baby charm?"

Harry blinked when he looked at the people in front of him. His parents, he himself and Remus and Sirius, obviously. It was very disturbing to see himself as a little baby, in the arms of his long-gone mother.

He looked at the people more attentively and blinked again. His own parents were just like he'd seen them in many photographs, there was nothing weird there. But his "uncles"... They just didn't seem to be right, in some way.

He tried to see what exactly was disturbing him in their appearance. He soon found something odd in both of them.

Remus looked even more shaggy than usually, his hair had lost its usual shine, and his eyes didn't seem to be a half as clear amber colour as usually. Harry didn't understand at all. It couldn't be his usual appearance in this age; he'd seen much enough photos of all the Marauders to know that this wasn't right.

Sirius was also different here, but in opposite way. Harry couldn't recall seeing his hair ever so black and shiny and soothe, nor had he seen his godfather's eyes so pale and clear blue in the whole time he had known him. The Animagus seemed to be taller than usually, and much more muscular, and generally more... beautiful. There wasn't another word for it.

Then it hit him. '_This has to be Remus's part of the memories,'_ he understood. 'O_f course he remembers himself worse and Sirius better than they actually were.'_

He looked at the events in front of him, secretly very excited to see his first - and last - Christmas with his parents.

Little Harry was now in Sirius's lap. The man was shamelessly cooing to the baby just as senselessly as his mother had done. Remus was looking at them with a tiny smile in the corner of his mouth.

"You'd make an excellent father, Sirius," James laughed. "Although I really doubt that you'd ever be able to raise law-abiding children."

"Are you saying I'm a criminal?" Sirius asked, playing insulted. "You'd better take that back!"

"You know very well he didn't mean that, love," Remus chuckled. "He was just referring to your - let's say, _interesting_ attitude towards any rules."

"I'm not that bad, am I?" Sirius asked, grinning.

"Oh, yes you are," James said. "Everybody knows that, Paddy, old pal. Heck, if in the graduation the Headmaster referred to you as 'the Detention Champion of Hogwarts,' one could maybe think you don't have the best relationships with authorities..."

"Yes," Sirius grinned. "And still I'm supposed be the one who makes sure that other people are following the rules."

"Of course," Lily snorted. "You know every way to break the rules. You're a dream Auror. No criminal can make up anything you haven't thought about already."

The discussion would maybe have lead to even more interesting statements, if only little Harry hadn't begun to cry. Sirius tried to calm him down, but his attempts were pretty useless. Lily was just about to take her son from his godfather, but Remus got him first.

"Let me try," he said, before focusing all his attention to Harry. He rocked the little boy on his arms, whispering a little lullaby to him. Slowly Harry stopped crying, then he yawned a couple of times, and soon he was asleep.

James gave him a wide smile. "Unbelievable," he breathed. "Even I can't calm him down if he's crying. He only accepts Lily."

"Right," Lily smiled while taking the sleeping baby from the smiling werewolf. "If Sirius would be a good father, then you'd make an excellent mother!"

They all laughed. Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus's shoulders, and the werewolf rested his head comfortably on Sirius's shoulder.

The four friends continued discussing everyday topics. Harry didn't listen very carefully. He only enjoyed the warm and comfortable atmosphere, really wondering if he was in the right memory at all. How could this ever be painful?

At last a part of discussion caught his ear. "It's really a pity Wormtail couldn't come," Sirius said.

"Right, Paddy," James replied with a nod. "I hope his mother will get better."

"His mother will get better," Remus echoed and snorted. "Why does this sound so familiar to me?"

"Eh, forget it, honey," Sirius replied, fiddling with one of Remus's light brown tresses. "It isn't very likely that he'd be a werewolf as well, right?"

"Because we are on the topic," James said, "I'd want to say I'm sorry I wasn't there the last full moon, Remus. And because Peter wasn't there either, it was just you two, right?"

The two men glanced at each other and smiled slightly. Then Sirius put on a mysterious expression, a mischief playing in his eyes. "Actually," he said, "no transformation took place on the last full moon."

James and Lily both stared at him. "I beg you pardon?" James said, looking very shocked. "You didn't say that, did you?"

"In fact, I did." Sirius glanced again at Remus, who smiled warmly at his husband. "Do you remember what we talked about few months ago? About some Ministry thing?"

Lily seemed to be thinking very hard. "You two were accepted to..." Her eyes widened suddenly. "Now I remember! You were accepted to Ministry's Male Pregnancy list! You - you don't mean -"

"Yes, he does," Remus grinned. "I and Sirius, we're going to be parents as well as you are. If we've counted right, she will be born some time after Harry's first birthday."

"Oh, that's wonderful!" Lily exclaimed. "I'm so happy for you both!" She gave them a beaming smile.

James smiled as well. "Congratulations," he said happily. "If anyone deserves that, it's you two. You've both had a childhood terrible enough. I'm glad it's your time to be happy."

"Thank you," Sirius smiled. "We're glad about it as well, you know." He enveloped Remus into a tight embrace. The werewolf snuggled up to him, looking just as comfortable as Lily did sitting next to James.

They started talking about the news, but Harry didn't hear anymore. He room was swinging in his eyes. He couldn't concentrate on anything, and there was only one sensible thought in his mind, '_What happened to the baby? What happened to the baby?'_

Harry closed his eyes, trying to focus on that thought. When he opened them again, he was in another memory.

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The next (and last) chapter: **More Memories**

Harry finds out what happened to the baby, and also realizes why he was now shown these memories. The end.


	3. More Memories

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine. Just the plot.

A/N: Review, I'm getting a bit desperate...

WARNING: MPREG and SLASH RL/SB in this chapter.

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Chapter 3

More Memories

Harry stood in the corner of a little office. He saw the young Sirius Black standing in front of his desk in the middle of room. Sirius was just going through some papers on his desk when there was a knock on his door.

"Come in," he said absent-mindedly. "The door is open."

The young Auror heard the door opening and looked up to the in-comer. His eyes widened in shock when he saw his guest. Harry was just as surprised.

It was James Potter, right. Sirius's best friend. But his face was white as snow and his lips were trembling, like he was just about to start crying on any moment.

"What now, James?" Sirius asked, looking alarmed. "What's wrong?"

James just stared at first. Then he said, with very quiet voice, "Sirius... I'm so _sorry_..."

Sirius stared at his best friend, shocked. "James?" he asked. "What has happened? Is it - oh, Merlin, tell me it's not Remus, not him and the baby, anything but that..."

"Oh, Sirius... I'm so sorry..." James repeated, and there were huge tears pouring out from his hazel eyes, running down his cheeks. He mumbled something that Harry didn't quite hear, but Sirius seemed to hear very well. All colour ran off from his face, and he stared blankly at his best friend.

Harry understood him. Although he hadn't heard nearly anything out of his father's muttering, he was able to catch some single words. Those words were, "Remus... miscarriage... St. Mungo's."

When James had finished his explanation, Sirius only stared in front of him for a moment. Then, very slowly, he turned around and walked towards his boss's office. Harry followed him, walking like an invisible ghost next to the memory of his father. It felt more than weird.

Sirius knocked on the door and yanked it open without waiting for a reply. "Mr. Thompson, I must leave right now. My husband - he's in a hospital -"

Mt. Thompson nodded understandingly. "Go right now," he commanded. "No reasons to lose any time. May I ask what's wrong with Remus?"

But Sirius was already gone and wasn't there to reply his question. James was, though. He looked at the man and told, "Remus has just miscarried."

The old Auror's eyes widened. Then he nodded firmly. "Go with him, Mr. Potter," he advised then. "They'll both very likely need just as much help as you can support them with."

James turned around without saying a word, then started to run to get outside of the inner Ministry's Non-Apparating Wards.

And suddenly, Harry was inside another memory.

()()()()

Harry was in a hospital room. Everything was clean and white. The only real furniture in the room was a large bed in the middle of the room and a single chair next to it. On the chair was sitting Sirius, looking grave serious. Remus was laying in the bed, looking very pale and sick.

Harry felt very bad for them both. He understood very well why Remus had felt bad for showing him these memories. He felt like he'd cry on any moment, so bad he was feeling for his new guardians.

Remus took the hand Sirius was offering him and squeezed it tightly. Looking miserable, his lips trembling, he whispered, "Sirius... I've lost our baby." Then he bursted into tears, unable to say anything else.

Sirius enveloped him in a comforting embrace. "Calm down, sweetheart," he murmured, tears forming up in his own eyes as well. "Calm down, Remus. Don't worry about that. Just rest now, love."

"But... but it was my fault," Remus stammered between sobs. "If I... If I only had been more careful... we could still have her."

Sirius crumbled his eyebrows. "Don't say that!" he commanded, embracing him even warmer and tighter than before. "It definitely wasn't your fault, Remus. It was anything but your fault." Then he continued, with a much softer tone, "It was no one's fault, love. No one could have prevented it. We knew the risks, didn't we?"

"That's my point!" the werewolf cried out. "I knew the risks! I knew I should have been careful! But I wasn't, and now... I've lost her..." Then he started to cry even more than before.

"Shut up, Remus!" Sirius exclaimed. "Don't you dare to blame yourself!" He kissed the other man gently on the forehead. Then he added, taking a more tender and comforting tone, "Try to get it in your head, Remus, my love. It wasn't your fault. You're the one here who has been hurt the most. No one is going to blame you, sweetheart."

"But I will blame myself," Remus mumbled. "I can never forgive myself for not being more careful, Sirius. Never."

"Don't speak like that, love," Sirius advised. "You couldn't have prevented it." Then he sighed deeply. "Let's discuss this everything later, okay? Now get some rest. You need it."

"Okay."

On the same moment as Remus said the last word, Harry felt the world waving around him again.

()()()()

Sirius was there waiting for him when he stepped out from the memory. His adopted father looked sad, and his eyes were locked on the ground.

"You're back, I see," he said, not looking at Harry.

"Yes, I am," Harry said, closing his eyes in confusion. "I - I am so sorry for you both, Sirius. Nobody deserves anything like that. Especially not you."

"Thank you, Harry. We've been over it for ages, but still... It hurts." Then Sirius managed a little, shaky smile. "Harry... I know you want to ask something. So, go ahead."

"Why didn't you show me this until now?" Harry asked, his eyes still closed. He tried to sort out his thoughts. "Or why not later? Why did you show it to me at all? There are no real reasons for me to know that!"

Sirius smiled slightly. Then he said with an oddly gentle tone, "Harry... Remus didn't transform the last full moon. Nor did he on the two full moons before that."

Harry's eyes snapped wide open. "You... Are you saying that..." A little, stupid smile began to play in the corners of his mouth.

"I think he is," said Remus from the doorway. He walked inside the room and slipped his hand into Sirius's armpit. "I'm pregnant once again, Harry. The baby is due around Christmas."

"Wonderful!" Harry exclaimed.

"We thought so also," Sirius smiled. "It is indeed wonderful." He snaked an arm around Remus's waist and kissed his husband's cheek. "Just like you are," he said to the werewolf with a mischievous grin.

"Brat," Remus murmured, blushing, and slapped Sirius playfully over the neck. Then, however, he returned the kiss, a happy smile on his face.

And, watching them, Harry knew that they were just creating happy memories.

---The End---

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Yeah. That was it. The end. No more. It's complete. Done!

...Although I'm going to write a sequel, **Babies and Big Brothers**, once I can push myself to doing that... Complete with mood swings, raging hormones, and everything!


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